All about marriage

Fact or fiction (you make the call):

1. Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.

2. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin… they can’t face each other, but, they still stay together.

3. Married life is very frustrating.

.In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.

.In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.

.In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen..

4. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you canbe sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.

5. Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

6. Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something she says. After marriage, he will fall asleep before she finish.

7. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

8. They say when a man holds a woman’s hand before marriage, that is LOVE. After marriage, that is SELF DEFENSE.

9. A wife becomes a “SEX OBJECT” when every time the husband asks for sex she objects!

10. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

11. There are two four-letter words that are offensive to men in marriage : “don’t” and “stop”, unless, they are used together (“don’t stop”).

12. Marriage is an institution where the man loses his Bachelor’s Degree and the woman gets her Master’s Degree.

13. In marriage, a man can have words with his wife, but, a woman can have paragraphs with her husband.

14. Marriage is love. Love is blind.

Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.

15. There are 3 stages of SEX in a married life:

Tri-weekly, try weekly and try weakly.

16. LOVE is a long sweet dream; MARRIAGE is the alarm clock.

17. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why.

But, when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.

18. Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence … a LIFE SENTENCE.

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Feedback / Comments:

  1. honeytuesday says:

    FUNNY MARRIAGE IS FULL OF LAUGHTERS

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  2. hehe.. nice joke.. i like it, nice one.. Very funny.. 😀

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  3. he he, very funny but as a woman i believe its very true.

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  4. raptored says:

    this is funny but real…

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  5. Imamodder says:

    Hahaha, very funny, it happens in real marriage life (thats why its funny). Like it very much.

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  6. You found this funny? I see depression and frustration.

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  7. ha ha ha.. this is so funny. like it!

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  8. funny…i lyk it…

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  9. for God’s sake its a freaking joke. get a life. learn to laugh dude. it’s called sense of humor. don’t you have one?

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  10. nice joke… some were true… some for fun… let’s laugh!!! life is too short…

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  11. not yet married but i find the jokes really funny..:D

    Like or Dislike comment? Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

  12. I was trying to look for something w/c can possibly make me awake and I found this. haha. more more jokes more more fun..

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  13. Why are the “killjoys” doing in here…supposed to be this are jokes and don’t be serious about it, I read the jokes to have some laugh and for the comments some are “seriousheads”, why don’t you blog about your anger on other sites

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  14. bongzee says:

    face it . its true and itrs funny he he he he

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  15. jonathan sulit says:

    your opinion is not needed here.so don’t act as if you don’t commit mistakes in your life.It is only a joke, just go with it!

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  16. har har is KILL JOY!!!! go to hell if you don’t like the joke!

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  17. agreed..life’s too short..have a laugh.. ^.^

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  18. The one who made this surely don’t wanna be in a marriage. These are the philosophies of people who don’t wanna get married for sure, they who enjoy the life of bein’ a single.. As for me, being single is one of the greatest blessing to enjoy in our one and only life. Thumbs up “author”!
    lolx

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  19. i found this post funny hahahaha. don’t be serious life is short ok?

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  20. ..The one who made this joke are just existence of marriage in his/her life was the greatest failure to him/her…..don’t you ever criticize marriage …then yes you are correct marriage is a life sentence to the person to be happy…

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    • @harhar, i think you should not be reading jokes if you’re too sensitive or too serious about life and love. Pick a serious book, sit down and don’t laugh…

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    • Kill Joy? haha. We can always find humor in anytjhing. :b

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