Hi
All these years ERAP has been the subject of ridicule by way of the jokes written about him. I know ERAP is smart yet he has been satirized as thought he is so dumb. In a way he also spiced our lives in so many different ways including all the jokes about him. Here are some nice jokes my niece just sent me from the Phils. If this is your first time to read it laugh heartily, if not laugh anyway.
Jgly / Daly City
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Joke # 1: Sa panliligaw ni Erap, mahili g siyang sumulat ng coded love messages tulad ng:
ITALY – I truly adore and love you
SASAYA – Stay as Sweet as you are
Para lalong bumilib and kanyang nililigawan, sinikap niyang gumawa ng ‘love letter’ na gamit ang alphabet:
ABC – Always be careful
DEF – Don’t Ever forget
GHI – Go Home Immediately
JKLM – Just Keep Loving Me
NOPQRSTUVW – No One Perfectly Quite Romantic Should Treat U Very=2 0Well Napa-whew at pinagpawisan si Erap. Tatlong titik na lang and natitira…XYZ.
Pinag-isipan ito nang husto ni Erap. Makalipas ang oras, napangiti siya at pinalakpakan ang kanyang sarili bago sinulat ang:
XYZ – Xee You Zoon!!
Joke #2: FRIES
Kumain sa isang sosyal na restaurant sina Erap at FVR. ‘Give me Swiss Steak and French Fries’ order ni FVR sa ingles.
‘And you Sir? tanong ng waiter.
‘The same, Give me sweepstake and first prize, too’ sagot ni Erap.
Joke #3: GROUP
Erap was asked if a group of birds is called a flock of bird, and a group of fish is called a school of fish, and a group of wolves is called a pack of wolves, then what do you call a group of dogs?
Erap: Madali lang yan, anong akala ninyo sa akin tanga! Di anser is ‘asociation’ .
Joke #4: BRIDGE
Nagpunta si Erap sa England at nag-meet sila ng prime minister.
Habang kumakain, nagtanong ang prime minister.
‘Is San Juanico Bridge the longest bridge in the Philippines ?’
‘Yes,’ mabilis na sagot ni Erap saka biglang nag-isip ng maitatanong din, ‘Ah… Is London Bridge falling down?’
Joke #5: ANONG GATAS?
‘Ang gatas ko noong baby ako, Lactum,’ kuwento ni Marcos sa ibang presidente.
‘Ah ako, Enfalac, ‘yun ang mahal, eh,’ sagot ni Cory.
‘Ako, Lactogen, kaya ganito ako katalino,’ sabi ni Ramos.
‘Ikaw, Erap, ano ang iniinom mo noon?’ tanong ng tatlo. ‘Ano yata Lactacyd.’
Joke #6: ALLEGATIONS
In a cabinet meeting ERAP (galit na galit) :
THERE HAS BEEN A LOT OF ALLEGATIONS THESE DAYS AND I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHO THE ‘ALLIGATORS’ ARE.
Joke #7: The most intell igent ‘presidentiable’
Miriam Santiago, has challenged the least intelligent presidentiable to a televised debate. To make things interesting, Miriam says that every time she asks Erap a question which he cannot answer, Erap has to pay Miriam five pesos. BUT if Erap asks Miriam a question which she cannot answer, Miriam has to give Erap five thousand pesos.
Miriam asks the first question: ‘What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?’ Erap doesn’t say a word, reaches for his wallet, pulls out a five-peso bill and hands it to Miriam.
Now, it’s his turn. He asks Miriam: ‘What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?’ Miriam looks at him with a puzzled look.
She whips out her laptop computer and searches all her references. She taps into the phone with her modem and searches the Net. Frustrated, she sends E-mails to all her aides, assistants, and friends. All to no avail.
After over an hour, she admits defeat and hands Erap five 1000-peso bills. Erap says nothing, but politely accepts the P5,000 and turns away to go home.
Miriam is a poor sport and demands from Erap, ‘Well, so what IS the answer!?’
Without a word, Erap pulls out his wallet and gives Miriam another five pesos….
(61 votes, average: 4.46 out of 5)
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March 12th, 2009 at 3:25 am
Ang galing ng joke, si Erap di rin pala alam ang sagot sa sarili niyang tanong, naisahan niya si Brenda, este, si Miriam pala
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April 4th, 2009 at 12:04 am
wow grabe!!!!!hahahahahahah
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April 20th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
yun ang joke!
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May 1st, 2009 at 5:44 pm
gnda nung jowk n may title na ‘anung gatas?’..hahaha!
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May 3rd, 2009 at 6:17 pm
i love my jaja jowk lng
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May 16th, 2009 at 10:10 pm
masmaganda yong group
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May 17th, 2009 at 3:21 pm
yahoo that good
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September 21st, 2009 at 2:56 am
hahaha na iiyak ako sa katatawa
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October 4th, 2009 at 10:23 pm
hahaha i like the joke.i want to send it all to my google desktop
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December 9th, 2009 at 6:09 am
I like it , the most intelligent Presidentiables …..di naman kasi sukatan ng pagiging smart ay dahil magaling ka mag English.. kaya nga di umaasenso ang mga pinoy at ang Pilipinas dahil sa ganyang pananaw ng mga Pilipino
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April 5th, 2010 at 2:49 pm
patient:dok takot ako magpabunot ng ngipin.
dok: eto inumin mo beer pampatapang
(ininom ng patient)
dok:oh ano ok ka na ?
patient: oo dok! ang gumalaw sa ngipin ko bubugbugin ko
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April 9th, 2010 at 8:28 pm
I believe in the principles of Erap… Matibay! Yang ang kailangan nga bansa natin para magkaroon tayo kaunlaran…
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April 9th, 2010 at 8:33 pm
di na man talaga bobo yang si kuya erap… katunayan malawak at matured ang kanyang mga pananaw tungkol sa kalagayang politikal, social at ekonomiya ng ating bansa… malalim din ang pagkakaunawa sa totoong suliranin ng buhay pinoy… sana manalo sya sa 2010 para may pag-asa ang masa.
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April 14th, 2010 at 12:39 am
haha ayus dn ung pinaka huli ang galing haha
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April 18th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
fantastic! me and my husband fell off from our chairs!!!! more please !!!! Very enhancing!!!!! good jokes!!!!
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June 18th, 2010 at 8:11 pm
galing, napaluha ako sa kakatawa..
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September 30th, 2010 at 9:33 pm
bobo naman ni erap haha ang galing ng mga gumawa ng jokes na yan
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October 15th, 2010 at 12:38 pm
sana marami pang bago…
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November 3rd, 2010 at 1:31 am
hahahahaha kawawa nmn c ERAP!!!!pero nkakatawa nmn!wahahahaha
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November 5th, 2010 at 3:13 am
MAGALING ANG JOKES ABOUT ERAP
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November 21st, 2010 at 2:24 pm
kaya pla bulol mag salita c erap ksi ang pang “baba” gnamit nya sa taas…
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December 25th, 2010 at 12:41 am
nakakatawa!!!!!!!ha ha ha…kaya lang bat kaya si erap ang ginawang bida??????????
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March 4th, 2011 at 5:18 am
basta kay Erap…thumbs up!
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July 16th, 2011 at 9:47 am
CORNY!! Weak naman ang mga JOKES!
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July 22nd, 2011 at 3:49 pm
ang ganda nung huli ….. dami kong tawa ahaha
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July 31st, 2011 at 3:27 am
ahahaha.gs2ng gs2 q ung 3-4!angas!11
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July 31st, 2011 at 10:35 am
TULA NG MANLILIGAW
O, MAHAL KONG NILALANGIT, NILALANGWAN PATI PUWIT..
KUNG SA GANDA MO AKO’Y SAMBA, SA UTOT MO AKO’Y TUMBA..
KUNG SA LANGIT IKA’Y TALA, DITO SA LUPA IKAW TEKLA..
BUHOK MONG PA ALON-ALON, KUTO MO’Y PA TALON TALON..
MATA MONG MARIRIKIT, MUTA MO’Y DIKIT DIKIT..
ILONG MONG MATANGOS, SIPON MONG UMAAGOS…
NGIPIN MONG PANTAY-PANTAY, HININGA MO’Y AMOY PATAY…!!
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July 31st, 2011 at 10:38 am
pls thumbs up
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August 2nd, 2011 at 4:05 pm
thumbs up ka jan
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September 15th, 2011 at 7:36 pm
i love the jokes regarding erap.
lalo na ung intellient presidentiables..
more jokes for erap.. im a fan
whahahahahahahhahahahah
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October 3rd, 2011 at 1:03 pm
hahaha! kakatawa! dito laging panalo si erap.. sa Jokes!
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October 4th, 2011 at 12:00 pm
hahaha wais
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December 10th, 2011 at 8:55 pm
i like the joke re: miriam-erap question n answer..wise talaga si erap!
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December 14th, 2011 at 3:33 pm
di man ganun ka bobo c erap ah….mas bobo yong taong pinag tatawanan yong bobo na nga hehehe
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